laughter, fear, and weeping (i am hormonal)

Yesterday I was standing in line at JoAnn when an elderly black man started laughing and said, "Ah, I know what you've been doin'," pointing at my stomach. He asked me what I am having (as everyone does these days) and swore up and down that I must be having twins. Nice way to say that I'm huge. I laughed politely and wished he'd go talk to someone else, which he did a minute later (after laughing at me some more). It's the only time since my fingers have swollen up that I wished I had my wedding ring on. He probably thought I was some unwed youngun' (I still get carded when I order alcohol, but I know I don't look as young as my students!) that got knocked up by her boyfriend or a one night stand. But that turned out to be the funny part of the day.

I had a scare yesterday afternoon just as I was settling in to do some sewing while watching Days of Our Lives (yes, I still watch it sometimes, thanks to the Focal Point gang and our lunchtime between 1:00 and 2:00 each day). I suddenly was having a very, very bad cramp in my belly, on my lower right side. It was pretty painful and lasted about fifteen to twenty minutes. If it would have lasted much longer, I was going to call my doctor's office and ask if I should be worried; I didn't want to call too soon since I had just been in there and the doctor got called away for a delivery. Just when I was thinking about picking up the phone, it eased up and didn't come back. I also felt the baby moving, an important factor in my decision not to call. If there wasn't any movement, you bet I'd be on the phone and frantic. I did cancel my physical therapy for the day (thought it was safer that way) and I do have a rescheduled doc's appointment Wednesday morning, so I think I'll mention it to him then. I'd rather be safe than sorry!

From the cramping point on, Monday was a day full of emotions for me. I was scared and praying hard through my cramp; calm and subdued when I couldn't reach my husband and then didn't hear from him for two and a half hours (I'm glad I wasn't mad, as would be usual; he doesn't always carry his phone at work, and I told him he has to have it on him at all times now until the baby is born--let's hope he does!); and I wept when, all in the same two minutes, my cat used my belly as a launching pad and cut me with her claw and I found out I withdrew from my research credits two days too late and need to pay a 10% fee on my tuition bill because of it (and here I was trying to save money since I don't make any right now. Another $123 down the drain.). I was happy that Chuck was finally coming back on and that I could record two more shows that would provide entertainment for the rest of the week: House and The Bachelor. I was feeling generous when my husband asked if he can go to his nephew's basketball game against his alma mater tonight. I was disappointed that no one tried to contact me through Facebook (at least, in the early afternoon; I usually am disappointed, since most people tend to use it more as a popularity contest to gather "friends" rather than actually keep in touch with friends) and suspicious that maybe the group of people from my high school class that are getting together in two weeks has been quietly narrowed down to the core group, not including me. I was full of remorse and regret for letting some close relationships go a few years ago, and sadness that now that I'm trying to rebuild those friendships, the other parties don't seem interested. Basically, I was a smorgasboard of hormonal emotions and even crazier than I usually am. And frickin' tired of feeling a huge pressure on my bladder every time I stood up (and sometimes when I sit down).

I know I'm not unique in being emotional while I'm pregnant, but it does help to write things out. I combatted my emotions yesterday by taking a nap, writing, and then finally starting to do some sewing for baby, which I've been planning on doing a while now. And making dinner, straightening up the kitchen, and watching Chuck with my hubby when he came home. Ah, a day in the life of a prego. What a thrill!